Time; There's Only So Much to Go Around

How many of have wished for more free time? Lord knows I did when I was a rower, student, working and trying to fit in some semblance of a social life, maybe volunteer a bit and still try fit in an 8 hour night of sleep (if not you don't really want to talk to me). There were days when I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open walking down the street, or when all my friends were going out for dollar draft night on a Thursday  that I wished I had more time to do it all. We always wish for more hours in the day, we wish for more time. But what would you do with it if you got it? Well I have recently come upon such time; since crossing the finish line of my last race and walking the stage in my cap and gown my two biggest time consumers are gone (They were also two of the ways I defined myself but that's another post altogether...stay tuned).

Tick Tock goes the Clock

What did I do with my time you ask? Not as much as I would have hoped. I found after a day of playing with the kids I was often exhausted and I was taking advantage of having the time to have a glass of wine and chat with my mom or play more music. I caught up with old friends (although not as much as I would have like; did you know when you go home everyone doesn't live on Comm Ave?), caught up on TV, but all in all didn't take full advantage. I did take that 6 week trip, which was amazing and could have never done as a rower/student. I started to notice a strange pattern, the more time I had, the less productive I became.

The office was closed for the week between Christmas and New Years, and I found after the first few right after Christmas I was bored and wanted something to do, but I didn't do anything particularly productive. I didn't write many blog posts or finish my last lingering grad school application. I didn't workout that much or explore as much as I could have on my bike. I read a lot, and aimlessly browsed the web a lot (I wasn't a total bum, I didn't go on a lot of walk around town and some bike rides, went to the beach one day, etc).
I had gotten my wish, but "be careful what you wish for"; I've figured it out, I have been confused about a syllable. It's not more free time that I wanted, but more freedom. Time is finite, there is always the same amount; Twenty-four hours in a day, 365 days in a year (...except this one). Freedom is infinite, make of it what you will. I like being busy and now I get to fill my time with what ever I want. I better use that finite time to the fullest, because "being bored is for the boring" and no one wants to be boring.

I have a new project to work on during the days and I am more motivated to run, or bike, do something with my time. I am writing this blog right now.
It's easy to just get sucked into a vortex of not really doing anything. I am trying to figure out what I want to do with my fairly new freedom and fill my time with that. I have been trying to be conscious of what really makes me happy in my free time and spend more time doing that.
I know I said no resolutions but this isn't about that, its about trying to seize the day; something I normally try to do anyways, I just got a little lost on the way.

Lake Louise, AB
That day was truly seized

Much Love and Carpe Diem

Mariel